I realise I might be alone in this one but I sincerely hope not. Two pieces of homemade bread, toasted on one side. Two juicy, fresh-from-the-vine, homegrown, sun-ripened, achingly sweet tomatoes. Wrist-strain inducing amounts of fresh ground black pepper. A Health Warning defying sprinkling of salt. Dollops of mayonnaise that Pret A Manger would declare "obscene". The result is Simple Pleasure, Number 8: The Tomato Sandwich.